Independence

 The pandemic has already changed many things in our lives. But, be ready since there is much more to come. It can be changes in your work life or personal life, you should keep an open mind towards everything. A rigid mind can suffer when there is no freedom. An open mind is like a free bird, running water, and it goes with the flow.

Read more and learn more. Be aware of things going on around you. The whole world is suffering in mays ways due to the pandemic. Is there any way you can do something for your neighborhood? Try it out. The satisfaction you get from contributing to a social cause is priceless. Try to get information from right source and platform.

Yes, we are carried away by materialism and forget to live intentionally. These difficult times demand us to be minimalistic, and it is the best time to practise minimalism in your daily life.

Whether it is food, clothes, or any other basic necessity of your life, you should try to be minimalistic. More than that don’t try to restrict the minimalism just for material things in life. You should apply it to your thoughts as well.

Try to be kind, humble, and live without regrets.

This is the right time to look inward and flush out unnecessary items from your inner space, because we all yearn to be free from all the unwanted things in our lives. 

We are so dependent on technology that it is eating most of our time. Sometimes it may influence us positively, but you will receive negative vibes from social media as well.

Do not stick to any of your smart devices for long. Even though you use them for your work, keep some time aside to read books and to gain knowledge. Addiction has never led to independence. Cut down your screen time and spend it on inner improvement.

Before this pandemic ends, be ready to bloom as a better individual with inner independence. Humanity has faced many  epidemics in the past which were worse than the current one, however we have crossed those hurdles. 

Let us try to build a beautiful future by being independent yet being there for each other. 

True independence is when external changes do not influence you, but you stay proactive and drive yourself towards continuous improvement of yourself.

Read somewhere which comes to my mind now, True independence is when our soldiers dont have to die in the borders and when women don't think twice before going out anytime. 

Nandini Mithun 

Perception

 Valuable life is one that seeks the nature of reality. Many times, we end up thinking what we believe as reality and what we know as reality are one and the same. For a believer or a person of faith, when something sounds good, they will accept it without question, which prevents them from thinking about life or reality on their own. They have in fact given away their power to something that may not be the absolute truth. They place greater value on an outside authority rather than acquaint themselves with their inner realization from their own experience.

Discrimination begins only when the perception ends. In fact, discriminating faculty is like having a judge driving his/her decision purely based on evidences to find the truth rather than justifying something he or she believes to be the truth. The mind assisted by senses will function both as plaintiff and defendant’s attorney to justify the respective perceptions as truth submitting the belief system, upbringing, desires, attachments, sensory perception, etc. supporting what it believes as truth. There is subtle difference between intellectual conceptualization vs inherent realization of truth. They are like circumstantial evidence Vs proven evidence.

Knowing something deeply and intimately has the power to influence, transform, and enhance our lives. We don’t need affirmation from an outside authority to confirm the reality. Knowing something for sure itself is an affirmation and even if it is ridiculed by others, it never gets tainted. We all have inherent capacity to know or experience the truth, to engage with it directly and know it on a deeper level. Knowing operates beyond mind through direct experience unlike faith and belief. It may not conform to the standards set by the world but creates an indelible impression and a great sense of fulfillment. In fact, it transcends mental assertions caused by the influence of the senses.

In a world obsessed with the capacity of the mind, it is often difficult to express that we know something invaluable. Sometimes, intuition and insight we derived out of our experiences might be quite profound and might directly reflect the truth, but it might be difficult to conceptualize and present coherently to others as truth. But is it necessary for someone to validate our assertions about the truth, if the need is for self-transformation? There is a subtle difference between constructing our life with concrete Vs mud, isn’t it? Concrete is like knowing something for sure Vs mud that is built from the perception that might destroy quickly under different circumstances.

 Let us not allow our wishful thinking, belief system, upbringing, desires, attachments, sensory perceptions to be obstacles from knowing the truth and peace derived from our self-transformation. Name, fame, pride, recognition, etc. are minuscule when compared to euphoria we experience when we find the reality through a fulfilling self-transformation. Freedom from the barriers of senses and construct of conditioned mind is very blissful.

Nandini Mithun 

Maya

 What is maya? Maya comes from the Sanskrit meaning “that which is not” and there is ‘illusion’. Sages described it in different ways but common idea is that our body, mind, and intellect (“BMI”) can mislead our soul and entangle and entrap it into bondage.  However, the BMI complex builds the qualities such as desire, anger, greed, ego, attachment, and jealousy to create illusion.

In Mahabharata, when Duryodhana enters the hall of illusion (Maya Sabha) at Indraprasth, built by the great master of illusion, he loses his way, becomes confused and envious. When Draupadi laughs at him, he becomes uncontrollably angry, feeling insulted, and vows to take revenge against the Pandava clan for their audacity to display their power and wealth to belittle him in the presence of women.

The world is also not very different from the hall of illusions. We also live here enveloped by illusion, in a state of ignorance about ourselves, whereby we fail to discriminate between truth and falsehood, become confused, engaging ourselves in egoistic struggles and binding actions, and lose our connection with the supreme Divine Being which should be our destiny.

The deception of thoughts and associated happiness traps us into a never-ending phenomenon called life and cycle of birth and death. It is the desires and attachments that puts us in contact with the objects of our world. Once we experience it, we enter a trap of journeying for ever and stop thinking about going back. We become imprisoned into our thoughts and resultant desires, undergoing a series of births and deaths delaying our liberation.

Bhagavad Gita teaches us that the true meaning of the word Moksha is not salvation but destruction of delusion that precedes salvation. To achieve this, correct understanding of the mechanism of maya is essential. That is the way to release ourselves from the bondage and the pair of opposites such as pain and pleasure or sorrow and happiness. We get unshakable faith in our own mental phenomena, believing it is real. Mind is a cauldron of thoughts that develop into desires and attachments.

Maya is thus the enchantress who has cast this spell on

us and made us believe in the solid reality of this universe of myriad forms and shapes. She has made us believe in the reality of the forms and forget about the formless that is upholding the forms.

The sage of Arunachala known as Ramana Maharishi said

Just as the spider emits the thread (of the web)out of itself

and again withdraws it into itself,likewise the mind projects

the world out of itself and again resolves it into itself. When 

mind comes out of the Self, the world appears..

Therefore,when the world appears to be real, the

Self does not appear;and when the Self shines, the world does not shine. 

We inquire about the outer world in which we live but we failed to ask the questions to get to the truth in our inner world. Paying attention only to the body is like paying attention to the gift wrapper, paying attention only to the mind is like viewing the gift and paying attention to the divine existence inside is like paying attention to the love inherent in the gift.

Nandini Mithun 

My Goddess

 I was born in a middle class, educated, moderately traditional family On the religious front, I remember my maternal grand-mom praying and reciting all the shlokas before her breakfast every morning for a couple of hours, tears flowing her cheeks. Dad would say his prayers and that was it. Mom did regular pooja every morning and evening. 

I went to a convent school. Given this background, I grew up with a firm belief in the existence of a God and was a pious little thing, but I suspect it was more out of fear of a wrathful God and fear of my soul having black spots on it (as I was assured in school, I would, if I sinned). 

Entering the teens, questions slowly popped up in my little head and I started doubting. I asked questions. My mom was at the receiving end of the toughest ones. But she was no easy knock over. One day I asked her for proof. "Look at the beauty of Nature around you, look at the flowers, fruits, animals, birds, insects. Do you think any human could create such perfection?" she asked, that's it my little brain started quizzing again and again within itself. 

I have had my personal relationship with God (a neutral entity, genderless, formless). If I must choose an "Ishta Devata", I'd say Krishna and Ganesha, for their mischievousness, practicality and cuteness. But that is where it begins and ends. My relationship is mainly a matter of day to day personal conversations,confessions, apologies, thanks etc. to that formless entity. All credit to Him/Her for all that goes right and all brick bats too for all that doesn't, probably it is time i change this attitude. 

Today my true Godess is Nature, Mother Nature and I can't but look up heavenwards with thanks for all the beauty, greenery, birds and other critters around me. All I can do is pray to that Mother to forgive the arrogance and stupidity of many of our species and my human limitations in ensuring that I do minimal damage to her. She knows I do my best and never gives up on me. 

Nandini Mithun 

Who Am I

 Who am I and where did I come from

My mind asks this question constantly,

And my body looks itself in a mirror

Yet no authentic answer is revealed.

I visit my relatives, friends, and colleagues,

Looking to know who I really am.

They tell me all about me in detail,

Yet they are only what my mind is.

I take a photo of mine

Looking to see how I look like in real.

The photo has the professional touch and

Yet it is only what my body is.

I go to the places of worship

Looking for the divinity in visible form,

And close my eyes praying 

Yet no divinity appears before me.

I cry for help

To reveal who I am and where did I come from.

Then Comes the answer 

I see myself in you. 

When I delve into these Words of Wisdom

I experience the manifestation of Divine.

And when I surrender with devotion

I reach the summit of “I am I”

Nandini Mithun 

Let Us Cheer Them Up

What is feminism, is it playing a victim card?

Is it trampling a man and climbing up both the professional and personal ladders in life.

For me feminism means equality in all the genders without any discrimination. Yes womanhood needed and still needs righteous share of recognition, however have we been fair enough and recognized a man's struggle? 

Like a woman a man too undergoes a series of restrictions and judgements throughout his lifetime. 

As a child, he is expected to play the masculine and outdoor games, he is not supposed to play with tea set and doll houses, because those are girly games. 

From here starts his saga of restrictions. He is made to play the sports to make him fit into the Boys world. 

As he grows parents tell him to study and learn everything and if possible attend all possible Gate, window and door entrance exams, not with the intention of gaining knowledge but to prepare him for the financial success, his entire teenage years is gone in hearing that he needs to work harder to get a job or else his life will be shattered. 

Not many parents sit with their Sons ans ask what do they want to become in life. 

He is made to choose a career that can fetch money as he is assigned the role of the breadwinner for the family. He might be interested in photography or becoming an author, but his parents push him to opt for engineering or medicine, if not at least accountancy. Nobody gives a damn about his interests

After finding a stable job, the family look forward to finding him a suitable bride to marry and showcase to the world that their son is leading a respectable and homely life. Anyway, whether a man marries a girl of his choice or the family’s choice, the roles and responsibilities remain the same. He doesn’t have the luxury to quit his job and pursue his passions. Even though the wife may earn, it is still unacceptable in our society for a man to live off of his wife’s income as he explores and chases his dreams. He is chained to his assigned role as the breadwinner.

Post marriage he acts as a bridge between his mother and wife, both from two different worlds. He is called a Mumma's boy is he supports his mother and henpecked husband if he supports his wife. 

His role as a father is more demanding and exhausting. Yes he doesnt deliver the baby but he is mentally and emotionally stressed during the entire pregnancy. He manages his schedule and changes his personality. 

The entire financial responsibility falls on jis shoulder. 

To top it all, his work demands more and more from his every second, to show the world about his efficiency to get a salary rise and a promotion. 

Being a man he is expected to work late nights and crazy schedules and meet the deliverables. 

Isnt it then, a little unfair to be so harsh towards our wonderful men, who work for the betterment of our society and fulfilling their duties as a son, husband and father. 

Lets cheer up for them aswell.... 

I wholeheartedly dedicate this post to my husband who leads a stressful corporate life and yet manages to fulfill his duties as a doting son, loving husband and a wonderful father. 

Nandini Mithun 

Lets stop being judgemental

 Do you know that child, mother goes to work and maid has raised her, thats why such manners.... Poor child....

Do you know that child's mother, she js a double graduate and has decided to stay back at home and take care of kids, women like these don't think of economy and country.

A working mother has an early-morning alarm, the lunch-box packing, rush to the school-bus, the mad whirl at work followed by the return home, evening snack, playtime, study-time and preparation for the next day. All the while planning ahead, staying calm, hoping nothing untoward pops up such as an emergency at work, the maid taking a few days off, missing keys, a misplaced project, missing the school-bus, a forgotten PTA meeting, an empty refrigerator, unscheduled school tests, surprise guests. The list is endless.

If working moms are running the triathlon, then home-makers are surely running the full Marathon everyday, day after day. They are expected to do all this and more with monotonous regularity. The demands for favourite foods, the project work for school, guests expecting royal treatment, are all a permanent feature of their lives.  Admittedly, they do not have office deadlines, but there are more expectations from them on the home-front and everything needs to be clean and tidy and she must never be tired. 

Let us have respect for the maid-servant who helps run our home as she is a mother who has made the choice to work in order to put her children through school.

Let us respect the teacher, who deals with forty temperamental brats before heading home to pamper her own.

Let’s respect the nurse who puts in a dedicated eight hours assisting doctors with a smile, while ignoring her own aching feet and back.

Let us respect the home-maker mom who has dedicated herself to making sure her family is looked after her personally.

Let us respect the mom who rushes to work every day, and dedicates her time to her kids at home.

Every mother is special and she knows what is best for her own child. She feeds, nurtures, protects, teaches, rewards, reprimands and disciplines her child in an instinctive way no one else can. The rest of us cannot be judgmental about her or her choices. After all, we set the example for fair play and non-judgmental behavior for our children to follow!

We may have OUR own child’s best interests at heart, but that also means that every other mom does – for her own.

My mom is best for me, and so is yours for you. 

Nandini Mithun 

Friendship Day

 Today being the friendship day, i thought why not on write on the same topic.

Am sure we all have our friends at different phases, lucky are those who have their friends right from childhood to grave.

Truth be told, i did not have lot of friends in my school days and it was just one friend, college days we were a crazy bunch, thinking life was a lot of responsibility, uff how wrong were we then.

After marriage, husband's friends wife became friends and we started to hang out and formed a bond, slowly rhis started to change. 

Kids happened and their friends mothers were my friends... 

Importance of friendship has been induced in our mythological stories in characters such as Krishna Kuchela, Krishna Arjuna, Karna Duryodhana. 

All these friendships went to prove one thing that no matter what stand by your friend in thick and thin. 

Friendship can stay for a longer time, if we are ready to do certain things. 

Don’t get disturbed if he/she didn’t greet you on special occasions, please grow up. 

Don’t compare yourself with him /her. You are two different personalities

As you age, include sharing health tips, quitting bad habits if any, savings for children’s education, Retirement plans etc.

Try to boost each other to face the ups & downs in life. Never discourage or feel bad.

The support from friends is a rich asset. Take time to know about your friend's well-being, and provide them a shoulder to cry-on wben needed. Because there will be many to cheer him/her in his celebrations. But you make sure to stand there at the needed time. 

Remember a friend in need is a friend in deed. 

 Nandini Mithun